Tuesday, March 30, 2010

outside my window.

The brokenness and hurt in this world tears my heart to pieces. We live in a place with such incredible beauty, and yet such devastating pain--it's hard to reconcile the two coexisting. i tend to stay enamored with the hopeful scenes, and continue to be caught in awe of the wonder that makes up this place, but there are (often too unexpected) moments that shatter my colorful window of the world. It's those moments that break me for what i couldn't possibly begin to comprehend. Too many children lose their innocence here. Too many fragile hearts are bottled or crushed or stolen. Or given up on. And it's part of this place. It is a devastation that is engrained in the only home we know. The dark and dank corners have displaced the life that should be cared about and cherished and healed. It's broken.

i have often been told that i live a blessed life. i agree wholeheartedly. It is clear to me that my life is different than almost anybody else i meet. My life has always been a gift, filled with sunshine and rainbows and a spirit of truth always coming through to meet me. i have experienced difficult and painful things, but have always been carried through. It is becoming more and more clear to me just how many damaging situations i have been protected from. i can't help but think, or maybe just hope, that there is a reason for that somewhere. Because the normalcy of pain and fear and abuse and addictions and deception is far too great. And it breaks me to the core of who i am that this place our God designed expressly for his treasured children with such care and attention to extraordinary detail is so often the scene of commonplace detachment and stolen hope. We were created for so much more than that. Every single one of us.

i want to be a part of the healing. The rebuilding. The duct taping. Whatever it takes to remove the shards that keep cutting and scrub the layers of dirt off the windows. Life is for everyone. i don't think i'm the only one who was supposed to get the joy and wonder.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
- Jesus (John 10:10)